I had an great conversation with my husband this morning about our minds sets. He has been in a little rut with his work and it takes a lot out on a person who is doing their personal best. How do we change our mind sets and get out of the "Ruts"?
We all struggle with our own personal challenges life hands us. Or more like throws at us while we try to juggle the tasks we have. My latest rut is with running. I have gone back and forth on running a marathon. It motivates me to do something I feel is so out of reach. While I'm running my mind tells me how are you going to run 26 miles when you can barley do a few. The rule of "Start Small " echos in my head. But how do I go from small to bigger, then even bigger! So I looked up races in my region and have hit up friends to go with(still trying to have friends go with me). I have one race planned for 8.5 miles . I know I can do that! There is a marathon in Jan that's lingering on my mind. But I have a head full of excuses:
I want my first(and maybe only) marathon to be at or around sea level(it won't happen with this one)
I want to be in the best shape of my life(well hat was like 10 years ago).
I need a friend to do it with me for moral and motivational support.
I want to get pregnant soon, so maybe it's not a good idea.
You can see why it's my rut. I have some good excuses. With our ruts we need to have a sense of urgency to change. Is our rut keeping us from progressing? Is it holding us back from something better? Is it stopping us from being more happy? How often is it in our minds? Are we holding back other?
Some may be more of a personal accomplishment, like mine. Some may be more important then others. Take a different route, a different approach to how you usually do things. Ask for some advice from someone you wouldn't usually. Ponder in a way you've never done. Read a book or search the Internet with your questions.
If you are doing your personal best, just dig a little deeper. You can do it! Don't forget to breathe!
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Leap into Responsibility
In 9th grade at was at a friends house getting ready to go out on the town. She really wanted to wear a certain shirt. We had a couple of hours to kill before we were set to leave. I said
"Go put it in the washer, we'll have time."
"My mom's not home."
"So what, do you have to ask your mom for permission?"
"No, I don't know how to use the washer."
I couldn't believe it! She was 15 and didn't know how to use the washer!I showed her how to do it(she was a little reluctant thinking her washer might be different). In fact that day I showed her how to use the dishwasher too.
That day I realized how important it is to have personal stewardship and self reliance. We need to be responsible in our temporal needs.We may not struggle with the washer, but how are we doing with our money? Do you rely heavily on others to take control of the things you don't like or understand? Do you know how much is coming in, and how much is going out?
If you don't control your money, it will control you. In college I was saving up for a trip that cost a lot of money. Some friends would make fun of "My Budget." I would have to turn down movie offers or some other fun thing if I have already used my budget for the month.
Then they would say "I wish I could travel like you, I'm too poor." I wasn't rich ladies and gentlemen I just had a goal! Now in college is was easier. I didn't have to worry about mortgages, unexpected doctor visits, insurances going up, and many more things that throw you a lemon. But the principals are the same. Here are some guide lines I got from the book The Five Lessons A Millionaire Taught Me, By Richard Paul Evans(highly recommend, it's a mix between Ramsey and Kiyosaki)
1. Know How Much Money You Have-
At the end of each month fill out a your expenses and chart your progress. How much is your net worth?
2. Know Where Your Money Comes From-
Every little thing from paycheck to eBay or yard sales. One time bonus should only be used for one time expenditures(vacation, student loans, paying down mortgage).
3. Know Where Your money is Going-
Knowing where you spend your money is the only way you can control it. Don't just let others or spouse mange it. Keep track in a ledger, computer program(like quicken). Make sure you pay yourself, and give yourself a budget.
4. Know What Your Money is Doing-
Find ways to have your money work for you. When you stay true to yourself and take responsibility of your investments, you'll be more clear about your money working for you. Saying " I don't have time for this.." is like ignoring traffic signs when you drive. You make time. And when your actively looking to create new avenues , they will appear.
That's just a snippet of the lesson on taking responsibility. There are 4 others! It's important for us to learn about our own wealth and know what money can do for us. And focusing on money is not bad, it's actually good and responsible. It's bad when we make money our only focus and it consumes us. So let's take control and be involved in our finances.
"Go put it in the washer, we'll have time."
"My mom's not home."
"So what, do you have to ask your mom for permission?"
"No, I don't know how to use the washer."
I couldn't believe it! She was 15 and didn't know how to use the washer!I showed her how to do it(she was a little reluctant thinking her washer might be different). In fact that day I showed her how to use the dishwasher too.
That day I realized how important it is to have personal stewardship and self reliance. We need to be responsible in our temporal needs.We may not struggle with the washer, but how are we doing with our money? Do you rely heavily on others to take control of the things you don't like or understand? Do you know how much is coming in, and how much is going out?
If you don't control your money, it will control you. In college I was saving up for a trip that cost a lot of money. Some friends would make fun of "My Budget." I would have to turn down movie offers or some other fun thing if I have already used my budget for the month.
Then they would say "I wish I could travel like you, I'm too poor." I wasn't rich ladies and gentlemen I just had a goal! Now in college is was easier. I didn't have to worry about mortgages, unexpected doctor visits, insurances going up, and many more things that throw you a lemon. But the principals are the same. Here are some guide lines I got from the book The Five Lessons A Millionaire Taught Me, By Richard Paul Evans(highly recommend, it's a mix between Ramsey and Kiyosaki)
1. Know How Much Money You Have-
At the end of each month fill out a your expenses and chart your progress. How much is your net worth?
2. Know Where Your Money Comes From-
Every little thing from paycheck to eBay or yard sales. One time bonus should only be used for one time expenditures(vacation, student loans, paying down mortgage).
3. Know Where Your money is Going-
Knowing where you spend your money is the only way you can control it. Don't just let others or spouse mange it. Keep track in a ledger, computer program(like quicken). Make sure you pay yourself, and give yourself a budget.
4. Know What Your Money is Doing-
Find ways to have your money work for you. When you stay true to yourself and take responsibility of your investments, you'll be more clear about your money working for you. Saying " I don't have time for this.." is like ignoring traffic signs when you drive. You make time. And when your actively looking to create new avenues , they will appear.
That's just a snippet of the lesson on taking responsibility. There are 4 others! It's important for us to learn about our own wealth and know what money can do for us. And focusing on money is not bad, it's actually good and responsible. It's bad when we make money our only focus and it consumes us. So let's take control and be involved in our finances.
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Being Present
The past is history
The future is a mystery
Today is a gift
That is why we call it the present
How easy is it to be in the present? What does is mean to be in the present?
We are surrounded by distractions: The chores around the house ,that enticing television show, our work loads, the Internet blogs we get glued too. The list can go on! There is an on going cliche about the guy in front of the television or computer giving the "yes dear" response but not truly listening. I would love to say that as a women I am a great listener , and that I never tune out people in my life.
Today I've tried to be more present. It has been harder than I thought! I noticed that tuning out my children can be natural(AHHHH)!!! I kept saying to Ky "Tell me again." And try to give my full attention and listen to what he was sharing. He told me a couple of times today that he loved me and gave me a big hug. At one time I was reading and sort-of ignoring his chatty conversation. I stopped and gave him eye contact and huge smile spread across his face. So often, we push our kids, spouses, acquaintances, friends, and co-workers aside because we're distracted.
I have "alright" friends. I hate to say this, but these friends are people who I interact with but they're not my favorites. My eyes tend to glaze over when they get chatty about random things(I have done this with my good friends too, just it happens more with alrighties). I start thinking of things I need to get done and realize I missed half their story. Did I really miss the whole thing! There is nothing wrong with them, and I do like hanging out sometimes (but it can be awkward). I'm just not as drawn to their personalities as much as others. Maybe I need to make more of an effort to get to know them or be content knowing that we can't be buddy/buddy with everyone. Either way I need to be present. Doing my best to understand others and giving my full attention. I could make a bestie out of it, so I need to try harder!
And what about the people we know we don't like? Or the people that drive us Mad!? We can choose our attitude. We can still be present and respectful. When we are kind and coming from the heart, I believe that other person is more likely to respond better. There is no guarantee, but you know you did your best.
Our answers can be more clear and present when we ask questions and are honest.
"Is this a good time to talk?"
" You seem to be distracted, can I come at a better time?"
Or it could be the other way around with your children.
"Hey Buddy I'm busy doing so and so but right before dinner I want us to have a 15 min date on how your day was!"
Letting our loved ones or "alright friends" know our intentions up front goes a long way. And we must follow through with what we say! Also saying I love you when your totally distracts help too!
" I love you so much!, can you wait 10 min.(with a smile!)"
So this week be present to those you encounter. :)
The future is a mystery
Today is a gift
That is why we call it the present
How easy is it to be in the present? What does is mean to be in the present?
We are surrounded by distractions: The chores around the house ,that enticing television show, our work loads, the Internet blogs we get glued too. The list can go on! There is an on going cliche about the guy in front of the television or computer giving the "yes dear" response but not truly listening. I would love to say that as a women I am a great listener , and that I never tune out people in my life.
Today I've tried to be more present. It has been harder than I thought! I noticed that tuning out my children can be natural(AHHHH)!!! I kept saying to Ky "Tell me again." And try to give my full attention and listen to what he was sharing. He told me a couple of times today that he loved me and gave me a big hug. At one time I was reading and sort-of ignoring his chatty conversation. I stopped and gave him eye contact and huge smile spread across his face. So often, we push our kids, spouses, acquaintances, friends, and co-workers aside because we're distracted.
I have "alright" friends. I hate to say this, but these friends are people who I interact with but they're not my favorites. My eyes tend to glaze over when they get chatty about random things(I have done this with my good friends too, just it happens more with alrighties). I start thinking of things I need to get done and realize I missed half their story. Did I really miss the whole thing! There is nothing wrong with them, and I do like hanging out sometimes (but it can be awkward). I'm just not as drawn to their personalities as much as others. Maybe I need to make more of an effort to get to know them or be content knowing that we can't be buddy/buddy with everyone. Either way I need to be present. Doing my best to understand others and giving my full attention. I could make a bestie out of it, so I need to try harder!
And what about the people we know we don't like? Or the people that drive us Mad!? We can choose our attitude. We can still be present and respectful. When we are kind and coming from the heart, I believe that other person is more likely to respond better. There is no guarantee, but you know you did your best.
Our answers can be more clear and present when we ask questions and are honest.
"Is this a good time to talk?"
" You seem to be distracted, can I come at a better time?"
Or it could be the other way around with your children.
"Hey Buddy I'm busy doing so and so but right before dinner I want us to have a 15 min date on how your day was!"
Letting our loved ones or "alright friends" know our intentions up front goes a long way. And we must follow through with what we say! Also saying I love you when your totally distracts help too!
" I love you so much!, can you wait 10 min.(with a smile!)"
So this week be present to those you encounter. :)
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